Thinking Inside the Box

Remember that TV show where these alien creatures sat in a movie theater and dissed whatever movies, or music videos were being featured?

This is my version of that… The grey text was taken directly out of an online Travel website article. The purple text is me.

“The world’s first and only underwater inn is the Jules’ Undersea Lodge in Key Largo, Florida. Guests scuba dive about 20 feet to enter the inn, which is a converted naval station. You enter through a pool and an airlock; once inside, you breathe and walk around normally. At night, escaping air creates a soothing, bubbling sound that is supposed to encourage your body to have an astonishingly restful sleep.”

Let me interject for a moment. There are a few lies in the above statement:

  • No one (except for the military) is allowed to convert naval stations, into anything. Oh, and even submarine bases are above the water.
  • Bubbling sounds of escaping air will not encourage any part of my body to have a restful sleep, and if so, I would be astonished! 

“Typical rate is $375 a night, per person. As a rule, only certified divers can visit. But, for a fee, you can learn enough about diving to qualify to float down to the entrance. And for an extra charge, you can get an advanced diving certification during your stay. Breakfast and dinner are served at set times. The lodge typically hosts two couples.”

Oh my!  My ribs are killing me and I want to pee so bad…

$375 per person, per night? HA!  HA!  You cannot get a Hilton hotel, for less than $450 per night in California, and it is a non-exciting, bland room. In fact, some of them don’t even have room service.

The true cost must be $3,750. Typo, you know.

Only Certified Divers are allowed to access the hotel, BUT for an extra, (undisclosed amount, did you see that?), fee, they can teach you enough so you can float down to the hotel. So, which is it? Dive or float

Multi-room underwater hotels may be on the way. Four companies claim that they will open hotels underwater within the next few years in Fiji, Istanbul, Korea, and Dubai….

HotelChatter has been tracking many of these announcements and doesn’t believe a word of them. Even if the hotels do materialize, they won’t be for budget travelers. Room rates will start at about $1,500 a night.

Did you catch that? Starting at $1,500 a night. For what is bound to be the formerly trashed room that leaks.

I think for my money, I will take my $1,500 and stay at a Hyatt Regency, where I will relax on the beach, and not under it.

♥  TTFN  ♥

 

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